Still haven't found that card reader

So still cannot post any pictures of things I've made etc...

Anyway, on Sunday night  started feeling a hot spot on my lip, which got more irritated as time past, I haven't gotten a cold sore in a long time...so it was weird, but not so much of surprise as in general my body is just plain doing weird things recently.

Last night I stayed up all night writing a paper, and well, I don't do so well with 3 hours of sleep and had a melt down that resulted in me going to acupuncture today in a complete state of crying and histeria.  But acupuncture was quite wonderful, and seriously I think it helped a lot, then I came home and took a long nap.

I am not sure why but I just feel so worn out, I can barely handle walking to school!

Also for my own record Janai got her Mission Call to Brazil!!!

karma

I sometimes wonder if it will come back and haunt me that I never leave feedback on ebay.

Starting fresh

Its already wednesday, and this week has not been an easy one.  But as I was reviewing my planner for the new week and seeing all the things I had to do, and all the ways I could do in advance to get things done I became grateful that each week we have a chance to start new. Just because last week I was barely keeping up doesn't mean that this week I won't use all my time wisely.

And each day is a chance to get make an improvement.

What a wonderful way to design the universe that allows so many chances to change and do better.

builder not a basher

I decided the other night after a long day at clinicals that  should decide to like nursing school until it is over, I think that with the right attitude I CAN do that.

I don't know if this is everywhere or just in nursing school, but it seems like everyone around me just spends their time complaining.  Complain that the tests are hard, complain about professors, complain about clinicals, complain about graduation, complain about scheduling.  Everyone if complaining about everything!

I am no exception, I'd like to think that I am a little better than most, but I actually doubt it because that's sort of what people's conversations consist of and to talk to them and try and relate ....it probably smart to join in the complaining.

And while maybe we complain just to make conversation, hearing it all the time really starts to rub off on how you actually feel about things.

So, I am making a goal to stop complaining about nursing school.  To simply decide that I like it and like it.  This probably won't be that hard because as soon as I start looking at all the things that I am grateful for related to nursing school,  I will have a long list.

Its a hard program and that's ok, but considering how hard it is and how strict they have to be, they try and accomodate you as much as is reasonable for the circumstances, which of course never seems to come up in conversation. wonder why?

Is it just human nature to complain? Do the people around you complain a lot?  How you deal with it?

also our card reader seems to have temporarily disappeared so until it turns up I will be using pictures via the library of congress

narcotics anonymous

No I am not addicted to narcotics, but for nursing school I was assigned to go to an AA or an NA meeting.  I finally (after weeks of procrastination) did that last night.  I did not really know what to expect maybe I bunch of people who were forced to be there who did not want to be, but I was impressed at what I found.

A group of people who were openly struggling with an addiction that they have accepted as ruining their life.  And there was a lot of love and understanding for them by those who have been (and are still going through) what they are now.

Immediately upon entering the room, I felt the love, I felt the spirit even, I felt that God loves each of these people and recognizes their attempts to get better.  I thought it was refreshing for these people to openly be able to take about how hard it is to recover from their addiction and refreshing to see people actively trying to make their lives better, and know they need help and strength to get through their trials...they come out of their free will.

I also thought of people in my life that I wish would have been there and could have survived the battle against their addictions.  

So, when I saw the assignment to go I was a little skeptical, but going definitely changed my perspective on the people there, resources available, and people involved.

I am grateful for the experience, and if you are someone who is dealing with addiction I would urge you to go.

Back from break

Well, its turns out it wasn't much of a break because i chose to work (good choice right?) and then after that Paul had a last minute interview in Ft. Lauderdale.  Poor Paul first he injured his back working out (still not better) then he had to sit on a ghetto greyhound bus for 6 hours each way...although he came back some interesting bus stories.  But this also meant that we couldn't go on walks which is what I was looking forward to for spring break most of all, non hurried walks together, but maybe this week?

So recently I have been sewing where I should be painting.  I have two started paintings that I wanted to work on over break, but instead decided to sew (I will post pictures soon).  I starting to think that I prefer sewing actually, mostly because you can wear what you make...you can't really wear a painting, in fact almost no one gets to see it.  So basically I am vain and materialistic ( although not so much in comparison to those around me) and I like clothes, so at least I am not spending money on them, except for just a little bit for fabric.

Tonight I am going to an AA meeting, I've never drank, but its required for nursing school as part of our mental health rotation...should be interesting.

This week made me wonder if I would make it through this semester.  It was seriously the longest week  of my life...it just seemed to never end,...clinicals finished...just kidding theres more and more and more and more...but thankfully last nights night shift means its officially spring break!  This weekend is still going to be crazy, but at least I don't have to wake up early on Monday morning and that is about all I need to keep me going right now.